WARNING: MORE PUBLIC WHINING

by Pang Khee Teik
More proof that sometimes gays themselves are the obstacles to establishing gay rights.

Someone from Singapore commented a few days on my note called IS THIS MY LIFE — HEARTBREAKS IN SILENCE? with this remark: “Well atleast he didnt get bashed up and beated or killed for being gay which happens all the time in other countries.”

I am assuming “he” refers to me. In my note, I wrote about growing up gay and suffering my heartbreaks in silence because I didn’t dare tell anyone how I felt for them. So I am assuming this guy is saying that compared to being killed, a heartbreak is nothing more than a pimple…

And then he sent me an email with this: “Im just curious..what exactly where U trying to say with that article?That U had problem coming to terms with being gay or that ppl didnt accept U and couldnt deal with it?”

I didn’t know how to answer that, as I thought my note was pretty self-evident. Also, I felt my note had both points and more…

Then he added me as friend, which I accepted, and he proceeded to chat with me. Here’s the transcript (xxxx is not his real name!):

XXXX
Hi there
send U an email a few days ago not sure if U got it
11:51pm

Pang
i got it, but not sure how to answer it. :):)
11:52pm

XXXX
er ok
11:54pm

Pang
i thought my points were obvious. and yes, that is points, plural. so there isn’t just one point but a few at the same time. it is possible to make more than one point, no? :):)
11:54pm

XXXX
I just think that there are ppl who had it FAR worst then U out there and to go all the way out just for that??
yet ppl deal with it
11:55pm

Pang
so if i slap you a few times over your face because i feel like it, and then you complain, can i say, hey there are people getting murdered out there, so you have no right to complain?
11:56pm

XXXX
complain yes..but I wont go write a lenghty article in a feeble cry for attention and tell the world I got slapped :):)
11:58pm

Pang
haha. i am sorry dude. i am not writing it for myself but for everyone who has had to suffer their heartbreaks in silence. that is the point. i don’t think getting beatened up is the worst thing in life. some people die in their hearts because they have been pushed around too much, and then they lose the will to fight back. like you.
Today
12:00am

XXXX
Hahah I dont bother about fighting back I cant change ppl so I just stay away from them and look for the ones that are worth it..Ive seen n read TONES of article ever since the 80s like Urs..nothing new..just tot that in this day n age..ppl…like U would have GOTTEN OVER IT!Lets face it..U only got the attention cus of who U are what u look like n where Ur from..lets just say someone I know, knows U n wanted to intro me to U till I read that article.
12:02am

XXXX
U chn ppl are always like that then when kenna bully cant take it..like those who go to austrial then complain ang moh racist whent back here and in MY most chn esp the gays are WORST to others…and tones of ppl agree me with on that…w/o me having to go write about it
12:03am

Pang
i have totally gotten over it. but unfortunately, a lot of people growing up now are still having to suffer it. and they are suffering it because idiots like you go around telling them to shut up and deal with it. you know how people end up in abusive relationships? it is because they put up with a little insult, a little push here, eventually they get beatened up regularly and they no longer are able to speak up about it. writing about it and speaking up about injustice is one way of making people out there become aware that they are not alone in their struggles.

and dude, stop you chinese people me.

it’s people like you who end up encouraging people to tolerate shit until someone gets beatened up.
12:04am

XXXX
pleas this is 2008..no one “puts” up with it..their happy enough with their psps and gadgets :):)
12:05am

Pang
you don’t sound like you are living in the real world at all
12:05am

XXXX
no one is asking anyone to tolerate but instead of publicnally whining they should do something on their own
12:05am

Pang
you don’t seem to have any idea how many gays and transexuals are being bullied and beatened up here regularly
12:05am

XXXX
haha pls..of course I do…
I know ppl who used to do that there :):)
12:05am

Pang
publicly whining?
dude
12:05am

XXXX
honesy I know KL well enough
12:06am

Pang
if you don’t like what i write
you don’t have to write to me and tell me
as obviously i don’t give a fucking shit
12:06am

XXXX
oh I was just killing time..was saving it for when I got introduced to U but then tot nah..waste of time..
12:09am

Pang
you weren’t interested in getting to know me at all.you just judged me as oh chinese gay, must be a whiner. so there you go in your safe ipod world. i am taking you out of my friends list as you are obviously not interested in getting to know me. so good bye. sorry i wasted your time. but i am even more sorry i wasted mine.

+ + + +

Gosh. He really proves my point no.10 in my last note: “There are many idiots in this life. They are idiots because idiots like us allow them to make life difficult for us.”

So here I am, publicly whining about being disagreed with by a gay man! When all I want is to be loved by everyone! Is that not a real heartbreaker?

I suppose I should really do something more practical. Like get on with the organisation of Seksualiti Merdeka! To infinity and beyond!

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